శంకరార్పణం - 3601

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శంకరాభరణం సమస్య - 3601

*“సూర్యుఁడు చందమామ వలె శోభిలు శీతకరుండుగా దివిన్”*

ఆర్యులు కందిశంకరులు హాయిని జేరుచు నర్సవెల్లినిన్

శౌర్యముజూప సూర్యునకు జంబపు కైపదమీయగా వడిన్

ధైర్యము కోలుపోవుచును దగ్గుచు తుమ్ముచు శైత్యమందునన్

సూర్యుఁడు చందమామ వలె శోభిలు శీతకరుండుగా దివిన్...

(కంది శంకరయ్య గారి సౌజన్యంతో)

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శంకరార్పణం - 3601

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శంకరాభరణం సమస్య - 3601

*“సూర్యుఁడు చందమామ వలె శోభిలు శీతకరుండుగా దివిన్”*

సూర్యుడు దాగగా మురిసి సుంతయు బుద్ధిని వీడి మబ్బులన్

కార్యములన్ని వీడుచును గండర గండుడు ముత్తుకూరునన్

భార్యనువీడి గ్రోలగను బ్రాహ్మణ వీధిని కల్లుముంతలన్

సూర్యుఁడు చందమామ వలె శోభిలు శీతకరుండుగా దివిన్..

(కంది శంకరయ్య గారి సౌజన్యంతో)

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శంకరార్పణం - 3600

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       శంకరాభరణం సమస్య - 3600

“చిత్రమ్మే కద సింహమున్ గనమటన్ సింహాచలం బందురే”

ఆత్రంబందున మూఢుడే చనగనున్ హ్లాదమ్మునన్ కోవెలన్

సత్రంబందున జేరుచున్ కనగనున్ జంబంపు సింహమ్మునున్

పత్రంబున్ మరి పుష్పమున్ కొనుచునున్ వైనంపు పూజందునన్

చిత్రమ్మే కద సింహమున్ గనమటన్ సింహాచలం బందురే..

(కంది శంకరయ్య గారి సౌజన్యంతో)

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My Comeuppance

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My Comeuppance

1990: IIT KGP:

Experts fascinate. Sometimes terrify.

In the 1950s in our village Muthukur there was this itinerant tribe: Dommaris.

They train their girl-kids into performing frightening tight-rope-tricks.

Blindfolded, they throw their new-born infants high up the air and catch them on their return, without fail.

Yet, most so-called expertise is practice and trickery rather than talent.

In our Second Year Lab in the 1970s, young gullible students, after failing to get their Newton's rings or Biprism fringes or Anderson Bridge balance points for two hours and a half used to look upon me as a wizard since I could get them all in less than a minute.

The poor guys didn't know that I was posted there as a fixture for donkey's years.

I was also brimming with pride that I could get the white light fringes of the Michelson interferometer within a minute in our Fourth Year Lab.

My comeuppance came duly after I "served" IIT KGP for 25 years and got a brand-new Titan wrist watch as a sweet memento from our Deputy Director in the Netaji Auditorium along with a hundred others.

It was like this:

I never bought a wrist watch for myself.

My first watch was a second-hand tiny Favre-Leuba affair my father gifted me when I got my job in IIT KGP in 1965.

It was a manually keyed affair. It had a knurled knob on its side turning which once a day "keyed" up its main spring.

By pulling the knob out and turning, its hands moved so the time can be adjusted.

That watch served me for all of 25 years and beyond.

I was told that my new Titan didn't have a spring to be wound up every day. It had a tiny battery and a chip.

But it still had its knurled knob. Pulling it out I could adjust the time; its hands moved very like my old Favre Leuba's.

Fine.

But it had windows on which were displayed date and day (the latter both in English and French).

These did not come pre-adjusted. They were displaying wrong date and day.

I didn't know how to set them correctly.

And I went on turning the pulled knob for all of 3 hours without success.

It turned out to be improbable, if not impossible, to set the day, date, and time by just turning its hands.

Crestfallen, I admitted failure and took the damn thing to the watch-repair shop in the Tech Market.

The expert whom I knew well was away and the fort was held by his urchin son, who grabbed my Titan, took it in his first, set the day, date, and time in half a minute, and handed it back to me.

I begged him to teach me his trick.

He kindly showed that there was a "step" midway while pulling the knob out. Holding the knob there and turning it this way and that, one can turn the displays in the windows of date and time:

Phew!

I recalled the story where this villager carried his son, bitten by a scorpion, to the village-pundit who confessed that he didn't know the scorpion-mantra.

"Such a BIG pundit you are! You know the vedas, vedangas, rudram, namakam and chamakam. But don't know as small a thing as the "scorpion-mantra"?

Chee chee chee!!!"

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శంకరార్పణం - 3599

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శంకరాభరణం సమస్య - 3599

“పుస్తకముల్ గనన్ ఖర విభూషణముల్ గద యెంచి చూడఁగన్”

నేస్తుల తోడ బాలకుడు నిండుగనాడి పరీక్ష రాగనున్

మస్తుగ తిండి మేయుచును మంచిగ త్రాగుచు మెండు మజ్జిగన్

కాస్తయు ప్రీతినిన్ గనక గాడిద చాకిరి యంచు నెంచగా

పుస్తకముల్ గనన్ ఖర విభూషణముల్ గద యెంచి చూడఁగన్...

(కంది శంకరయ్య గారి సౌజన్యంతో)

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శంకరార్పణం - 3599

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శంకరాభరణం సమస్య - 3599

“పుస్తకముల్ గనన్ ఖర విభూషణముల్ గద యెంచి చూడఁగన్”

జాస్తిగ రూకలన్ గొనగ జంబము మీరగ వేలమందునన్

పస్తును బెట్టగా తనరి పాపము నొల్లక చైలధావుడే

చస్తును బ్రత్కుచున్ విసిగి చాకలి గాడిద మోయుచుండగా

పుస్తకముల్ గనన్ ఖర విభూషణముల్ గద యెంచి చూడఁగన్..

(కంది శంకరయ్య గారి సౌజన్యంతో)

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Doctor Allergy

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Doctor Allergy

1967: IIT KGP:

Couple of years back I was down with a raging fever. But I hid it from my son and D-i-L. 

Managing with Dolos six a day.

On the fourth night the fever was shooting up 103, 104...

I couldn't come out of my bedroom.

My son and D-i-L visited me and found the temperature at 105.

They got scared out of their wits. My son gave me a tablet of Meftal.

And I was transported to the posh corporate hospital at midnight.

At the sight of its Emergency Ward, my fever vanished and I was smiling (scared).

The night-duty Assistant was wondering why I was brought at the dead of the night.

Anyway, he took samples of my blood and urine and my chest X-ray, and asked me to get lost and return next noon to consult with the specialist physician Dr Rao. By then the reports would be in.

My son took me to Dr Rao:

"Too bad! You have a nasty combo of Typhoid and Pneumonia. Here are four varieties of capsules and tablets. Take them and come after two days. If you don't get cured by then, I will admit you"

:)

Two days later:

"Miraculous! Completely cured of both!

:)

"Scared of admission?"

:)

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

One year later I had a wee dizziness and my son found my BP shooting up like a rocket. He took me to Dr Rso:

"Your BP is sky-high"

:)

"Here are two varieties of tablets. If your BP doesn't drop down in two days, I will admit you"

:)

Two days later:

"Miraculous! Your BP is sub-normal"

:)

"Scared of admission?"

:)

My son:

"Shall I bring my dad next week for a checkup?"

"Don't! Please don't! He is allergic to doctors. He doesn't talk. He only smiles. And my BP rises. Never bring him to me"

:)

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

Scared of Admission?

It is like this:

50 years ago when I was eating our Faculty Hostel food, I was complaining mildly of a wee acidity, in our Dining Hall.

Dr D, who was new to our BC Roy Hospital and was then staying in our hostel temporarily said:

"Come to the BC Roy tomorrow at 7 AM on empty stomach"

So I went.

Dr D summoned his senior sister and said something to her in Bengali which I couldn't follow.

Sister took me by hand into a room, laid me down on the table, and asked me to keep quiet.

After a few minutes she returned with a bottle, and a tube, and a funnel. She pushed her rubber tube through my nose right into my tummy and poured the contents of the bottle into it via the tube.

I was a chain smoker then and there was this terrific urge to pull out the nasty tube and run away.

But a pleasant drowsiness overtook me and I slept.

Till she returned after half an hour, woke me up, and drew the contents of my tummy into a beaker via my nasal tube, and went away.

This drill continued every half hour.

After the second round I was wide awake and dying for a smoke.

No way :(

After 5 good hours and ten suctions, she told me to get lost and see the doctor next morning. 

I cursed her inwardly and thanked her and asked:

"What was that liquid you poured into my tummy? Could I please have a bottle of it?"

"No way...Ethyl Alcohol"

Next morning Dr D was ready with what looked like my grim histogram. He inspected it critically for five good minutes and wrote out an illegible prescription:

"What does that prescription say Doctor?"

"Digene Tablets"

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

Allergic to Doctors?

No way.

My wife (a later addition) is an MD.

And I have a son of fun, my spitting image...

:)

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