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The 1960s were glorious years for a certain famous American monthly magazine...let us call it, TD. And they were also glorious years for me staying in the Faculty Hostel at IIT KGP and badly craving some readable and affordable stuff.
The Indian market then was literally flooded with TD. It came with 200 odd glossy papers with the finest printing, costing only Rs 2 per copy if you bought it at the Wheelers at the KGP station, Platform # 2. And there was this fantastic promo: you could gift a whole year's subscription to a friend of yours for a paltry Rs 18, thus saving all of Rs 6. And as a bonus you get a lovely pocket diary with a red jacket with the famous TD logo embossed on it.
I was a sucker for it and gifted annual subscriptions to several friends to get as many red diaries as I could afford...and gift these to my sisters. They used them as their dhobi-books. Quite a few friends complained that they got only the first four copies and the rest was silence. But it didn't deter me. Those were the PL 480 bonanza years and so Americans could afford to be generous.
The contents of each issue of TD were standardized: you start with a delicious Quotable Quote, mostly from Oliver Wendell Holmes or Oscar Wilde. Then you have a quiz that tests your Word Power...with scores grouped between 10 and 20...and you cheat a bit. Then there are fantastic ads for Ford Cars and Canon Videocams. Then a lead story decrying Russia and Communism and adoring American Patriotism. Then several more of the same. Then a World War II story which extols American strength and staying power, and the ingrained stupidity of Germans and utter brutality of the Japs. Then several more stories of the same.
A major attraction of TD was a Condensed Version of the latest bestseller at the end of the book, all of 50 odd pages. I still recall reading a Dunkirk Evacuation book, and 'Joy in the Morning' of Betty Smith where I met with the lovely word, 'funnelmelody' (aka 'fundamentally'), among others.
The best items of TD were its fillers, both at the bottom of each story and many vegetarian jokes classed under titles like Humor in Uniform, Laughter the Best Medicine etc. And I loved all the fillers and finished all of them before starting the main course.
Then I got married somehow and begot a son and was too broke to buy or gift any more TDs that soon became too costly for my pocket...PL 480 lapsed, Rupee devalued and the price per issue soared to Rs 10 and more. And the Cold War abated and Americans got too busy fighting unpatriotic wars. Over the decades TD slimmed down, its contents got monotonous, and it got impoverished in every sense.
My romance with TD expired.
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The 1960s were glorious years for a certain famous American monthly magazine...let us call it, TD. And they were also glorious years for me staying in the Faculty Hostel at IIT KGP and badly craving some readable and affordable stuff.
The Indian market then was literally flooded with TD. It came with 200 odd glossy papers with the finest printing, costing only Rs 2 per copy if you bought it at the Wheelers at the KGP station, Platform # 2. And there was this fantastic promo: you could gift a whole year's subscription to a friend of yours for a paltry Rs 18, thus saving all of Rs 6. And as a bonus you get a lovely pocket diary with a red jacket with the famous TD logo embossed on it.
I was a sucker for it and gifted annual subscriptions to several friends to get as many red diaries as I could afford...and gift these to my sisters. They used them as their dhobi-books. Quite a few friends complained that they got only the first four copies and the rest was silence. But it didn't deter me. Those were the PL 480 bonanza years and so Americans could afford to be generous.
The contents of each issue of TD were standardized: you start with a delicious Quotable Quote, mostly from Oliver Wendell Holmes or Oscar Wilde. Then you have a quiz that tests your Word Power...with scores grouped between 10 and 20...and you cheat a bit. Then there are fantastic ads for Ford Cars and Canon Videocams. Then a lead story decrying Russia and Communism and adoring American Patriotism. Then several more of the same. Then a World War II story which extols American strength and staying power, and the ingrained stupidity of Germans and utter brutality of the Japs. Then several more stories of the same.
A major attraction of TD was a Condensed Version of the latest bestseller at the end of the book, all of 50 odd pages. I still recall reading a Dunkirk Evacuation book, and 'Joy in the Morning' of Betty Smith where I met with the lovely word, 'funnelmelody' (aka 'fundamentally'), among others.
The best items of TD were its fillers, both at the bottom of each story and many vegetarian jokes classed under titles like Humor in Uniform, Laughter the Best Medicine etc. And I loved all the fillers and finished all of them before starting the main course.
Then I got married somehow and begot a son and was too broke to buy or gift any more TDs that soon became too costly for my pocket...PL 480 lapsed, Rupee devalued and the price per issue soared to Rs 10 and more. And the Cold War abated and Americans got too busy fighting unpatriotic wars. Over the decades TD slimmed down, its contents got monotonous, and it got impoverished in every sense.
My romance with TD expired.
Coming to stay in Hyderabad on my retirement I notice that the annual subscription escalated to a whopping Rs 960! And each issue has fewer pages and it looks like a skeleton of its 1960s fatty self and a pitiable vestige.
While we were living in the Banjara Hills
neighborhood 3 years ago one summer afternoon there was a ring on our doorbell and, going out,
I found my friend the retired Chief Engineer (80) leaning on the railings in front of our door with
a postcard sort of thing in his hand. I asked him to come in and be seated but
he declined…he was a standup story-teller.
He passed the postcard on to me saying that it was mine and he found it lying in the community post box for all of 10 days. On inspection I found it a reply-paid promo lit from TD asking me to enroll as one of its annual subscribers and win a fabulous Mercedes worth Rs 50 lakhs or an equivalent amount in cash...there will be a raffle.
I looked at it and casually tore it to tiny fragments and dumped them in the basket by the door. The CE was astounded and asked:
"Don't you want a new car?"
"No, I have mine"
"But you can gift it to your son"
"No, let him buy his own"
"What about the stupendous cash?"
"What will I do with so much cash?"
"You can buy an apartment in Banjara Hills"
"I have mine in Nellore, all locked up for 3 years and gathering dust"
"You are a fool!"
"Oh, yes! Why? Have you enrolled for the TD raffle?"
"Yes, it is this way..."
And then he told me his story for all of 2 hours. Apparently TD got his address somehow and sent one offer card for him 2 years back. And he was stunned for being one of the 'selected few'...call from the very heaven. He doesn't know driving but he has a grownup granddaughter to whom he wants to give a Merc as a whopping surprise gift. He never reads English books but it didn't matter...his granddaughter does, and all the back numbers which he is getting bound up would go with the Merc as a bonus.
After buying an annual subscription, he got a 6-digit number which he had to quote in all future correspondence.
He waited for a month and wrote to TD what happened to the raffle and when could he expect to get the results. And there was no reply. After another month he wrote again and he got a reply that there has been a lucky draw of sorts and his number came up to 112 as of date.
After another reminder, he got a reply saying that he should buy one of TD's listed books at a throw-away price if he wants his number to progress further. He bought one fat book at a fatter price...to go with the Merc as an add-on bonus.
And after another month, he reminded TD again of the Merc and the Chief Editor at Bombay wrote a personal mail to him commending his tastes and saying that his number has advanced to 9. And any further progress depends on his buying 6 more TD-sponsored books; which he did and stored them on his book rack.
At the time of going to press, his bookshelf is full of TD books and he got several fan mails from the US Director of TD praising him sky-high and announcing that his number is now just 2 and asking him to buy 10 more books to outbid the Number 1 gent from Alaska. Which of course he did.
And then TD fell silent for all of 6 months and he is writing reminders every few days...
Ghalib Saheb ne bola tha...
"ek dhoondo hazaar milte hain"
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