Henpecked Husbands

 *********************************************************************************************************

"ఎంత నేర్చినా ఎంత జూచినా,  ఎంత వారలైన కాంత దాసులే"

("However learned, wherever looked, however great, all are slaves of ladies")

That is what our famous poet-musician-saint Tyagaraja wrote centuries ago...he knows.

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

I haven't read any of our Puranas. So whatever I say here is hearsay :)

Let us take our Trinity first:

Lord Shiva, I am told, had to share half of his body with one lady; and carry another on his head. What a nuisance!

Lord Vishnu had to accommodate his wife on his chest. With the result that, when a madcap rishi kicked him on his chest, and his wife ran away in anger, he had to run around in search of her, and become permanently indebted to his treasurer.

And Lord Brahma has to keep his tongue permanently stretched out because that is where his wife is said to reside...very inconvenient.

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

Let us come to Ramayan:

King Dasaratha was so henpecked by one of his three wives that he had to not only lose his fond son but, soon thereafter, his own fond life.

And the said son was so henpecked that he had to lose his fond wife to a Ceylonese gent just because he couldn't put his foot down and tell her that golden deer are mythical. All his troubles had started long long ago when he had to meekly submit to her demand that she too would accompany him on his sojourn in the lovely forests of "Incredible India"

What about Lord Krishna? He was kicked by one of his wives, I am told; but still had to consent to wed another thousand odd dames.

What about the wisest man of Mahabharat? He had to obey his one-fifth of a wife and agree not to marry other dames; unlike his valiant brothers.

One such brother had to go forth in the forest to fetch flowers to please his one-fifth wife, and suffer insults by an old monkey who placed his tail on his way, blocking it.

And another had to turn a eunuch for a year.

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

Let us come to the best of our Vedic Sages: 

Uddalaka apparently had a wife whom he fondly called: "Chandi"

...Because she did precisely the opposite of what he asked her to do.

Being a wise man, he invented a clever ruse by which his wife obeys his real intentions:  He would ask her to do precisely the opposite of what he wants her to do :)

When time came for his father's death anniversary rituals, he said:

"Let us not observe them this year".  And she disagreed.

"Let us invite no brahmin this year".  And she invited three.

"Let us not feed them any sweets this year".  And she fed them six.

...And so on....

He was so charmed by the success of his ruse that he totally forgot it at the end of the ceremony and said:

"Great! Chandi! Go now and feed this pindam to our cow"

And she fed it to their dog :)

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

Coming down to our Greek philosophers, the wisest of them had to suffer the tantrums of his termagant wife. 

One day he was sitting on the pyol of his forecourt enjoying his sunbath. His wife was loudly cursing him. 

He told his friends, "Thunder has started...rain will follow." 

And his wife came out and poured a bucket of dirty water on his head and giggled. 

Instead of getting angry and beating her up, he smiled.

His friends asked him why he didn't drag her into the street and wallop her. He, being a philosopher (like me), replied:

"Oh! THAT is what you want so you can enjoy watching us two fighting on the road! Sorry! My dear wife gave me three lovable sons. Did YOU?"

And he drank his cup of hemlock committing suicide :)

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

Let us now come to our Shakespeare's four great tragic heroes:

Macbeth died due to the ambition of his fond wife. King Lear to his daughters'. Othello did kill his wife but thereafter killed himself. Hamlet had no wife but he went mad due to that:

"Brevity is wit...I will be brief. Your noble son is mad";  said Polonius

In England the wife of its King may be called a queen, but the husband of their Queen is only a Prince .

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

Let me now come to my own family which is the realm of my expertise:

My poor father was certainly henpecked. His wife (for her own selfish reasons) demanded that he bequeath his house conditionally to his only son, instead of unconditionally to herself. The said son thereupon sank into severe clinical depression and recovered only when he returned that gilded house back to his father's wedded wife.

My elder sister's IAS-husband was worse...he had to tonsure his admin head to please Lord Balaji when his wife threatened to tonsure her own otherwise.

All husbands of my other five sisters are equally henpecked, if not more; except the the one who was kicked out by his angry wife :)

My fond son says it is he who takes all their family decisions, since his fond wife asks him to say so :)

I am the ONLY husband who can declare that he is not at all henpecked (my wife in her sweet heaven is winking knowingly :)

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

Acknowledgment:

I thank Sri Kandi Sankarayya Garu for giving me the title of today's blog responding to my recent boast:

"Give me a word and I will give you a blog"

********************************************************************************************************************************************************