Monday, July 16, 2012

End of Mannerisms

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 As I said earlier:

http://gpsastry.blogspot.in/2011/09/frog-party.html



I make it a rule to avoid all 'Old Students Reunions' of retired folks. I do receive many phone calls from one or the other of my classmates at AU a half century ago, intimating me the date and time and venue of their Get-Togethers, saying they very much want to see me and talk of 'our good old days'. They do nothing of the kind...they talk about their own careers including post-retirement achievements.

To be honest I must say I feel a terrific inferiority complex regarding my own career, which can be summed up as:


"I joined as a teacher at 21 at KGP and retired as a teacher at 62"


As for my post-retirement glories I have only this to say that I fell into one of the deepest clinical depressions, and am still to recover (according to my six sisters and in-laws). They think depression is a kind of madness, which it is not...I am not saying I am not mad...but that has nothing to do with my depression.


In this connection I recall an amusing incident relating to my IAS B-i-L who always has many condescending things to say about teachers and their profession in general. About three years back he was in Hyderabad as our guest and asked me if I could drop him at the residence of one of his retired IAS colleagues in my Maruti matchbox. I agreed to drive him to the address on Road #12 Banjara Hills, a poshish place. And he was sitting beside me in the front seat talking all the time about the Cadre (much like foot-soldiers talk about their Paltan) which I didn't mind. But somewhere down the line he started decrying the uselessness of teachers implying he survived many of his teachers' teachings and rose from ashes like a Phoenix...I never heard him praise or even mention any of his teachers willy-nilly.


That, sort of got my goat and I pretended to take offense and swerved the car to the kerb, stopped, and looked sharply at him. And I could see terror in his eyes, like a mouse trapped in his cage, his left hand automatically grip the door-handle, and his right my driving hand soothingly...


But a year ago I got a phone call from Dr KM saying he got my phone number with much difficulty and wanted to see me. And I jumped up and told him the route to my apartment, a good 40 km from his home. And within a couple of days he arrived much to my delight and was welcomed warmly by my entire family because I told them he was my best buddy and cared for me for three eventful years in my student / RS life.


The real reason I was eager to meet him was that I recalled he had the best hand-waving mannerisms I have ever seen though he is not aware of it. When he speaks, which I make it a point often to do, his right hand is never at rest...it is dancing this way and that to emphasize the small point he is making...and he is modesty personified. And he didn't disappoint me...after these many years this cute mannerism remains as good as ever.

The other day he once again called and said he is coming down with another alumnus of AU (Phy), Dr SR, two years my senior who I couldn't place. The visit was ostensibly to condole us. And we welcomed them in and made them comfortable in the sofa and my son, D-i-L, and Ishani were all there sitting on the floor listening. And it was once again delightful to watch the hand-dance of KM for all of two hours.


And to make the occasion not very embarrassing, I started asking Dr SR about his career and the gambit went off like magic. Dr SR does have a remarkable career. After his MSc at AU, he was appointed as a young Scientific Officer at BARC, a coveted post, but he resigned within a year since he was shunted to the Electronics Division to repair the umpteen gadgets that others foul up. And he went to a prestigious school in Germany and did his Ph D in Nuclear Physics there..and then went to Africa and shifted from place to place like Nigeria, Zimbabwe, Kenya setting up Nuclear Physics Departments there. After getting bored with Africa, he went to Malaysia and  retired after 20 years as a Professor in Suva, Fiji!!!  










 http://www.travel-guider.com/fiji-islands.html


That sounded almost like from Maugham. 

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My wife grew up in her grandfather's place from her very infancy. And that was a place full of uncles, aunts, cousins, drivers, cooks and stuff...her granpa was an Executive Engineer.


So she learned to adjust with people and she needed a lot of that skill when she married me and settled down in that God-forsaken Campus of IIT KGP. And she was modest without a chip on her shoulder although she was an MD.


Her proudest moment was when she gifted me a bonny son pretty soon after our marriage. I traveled to Jalgaon full of curiosity to have a peek at the chap and pleaded with the nurse to let me in for a few minutes. She agreed and asked me to go to Bed # 5. And I found it was vacant and I was scared till I was told that she had been taken to the OT for a routine removal of the stitches.


And then I caught sight of a crib by the side of the bed in which was sleeping soundly what could only have been my son. And I tried to wake him up by gently poking in his ribs to no avail...he just opened his left eye inquiringly, smiled wanly, and went to sleep again. 

And then my wife walked in with the proudest ever light in her eyes...she had apparently every reason to be proud of her newborn son...even I have occasionally ;-)

I thought she was totally devoid of any mannerism; till a good 15 years after our marriage a campus telephone was installed in our Qrs. And then I watched her speak to her friends by the hour starting with what was on the day's menu to what Mrs R said about Mrs P...

And I discovered to my great pleasure  that she had this enchanting hand-waving gesture while she talked on the phone...one hand holding the phone while the other hand was constantly dancing. These gestures of hers gave me great pleasure till very recently. 

And the other day I talked about it to her, implying I was free from mannerisms...

And she retorted:

"You perhaps don't know that when you lie down prone on bed after keeping aside the book you were reading, your left hand involuntarily goes onto your chest as if you have a heart-ache while your right hand reaches to grip whatever is available...pocket-torch, cell phone, spects-case, or my hand"


How true!!!

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