Saturday, May 26, 2012

Curtsey

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The epitome of curtness is of course Alice's Caterpillar:


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"...The Caterpillar and Alice looked at each other for some time in silence: at last the Caterpillar took the hookah out of its mouth, and addressed her in a languid, sleepy voice.

`Who are you?' said the Caterpillar.

This was not an encouraging opening for a conversation. Alice replied, rather shyly, `I--I hardly know, sir, just at present-- at least I know who I was when I got up this morning, but I think I must have been changed several times since then.'

`What do you mean by that?' said the Caterpillar sternly. `Explain yourself!'

`I can't explain myself, I'm afraid, sir' said Alice, `because I'm not myself, you see.'

`I don't see,' said the Caterpillar.

`I'm afraid I can't put it more clearly,' Alice replied very politely, `for I can't understand it myself to begin with; and being so many different sizes in a day is very confusing.'

`It isn't,' said the Caterpillar.

`Well, perhaps you haven't found it so yet,' said Alice; `but when you have to turn into a chrysalis--you will some day, you know--and then after that into a butterfly, I should think you'll feel it a little queer, won't you?'

`Not a bit,' said the Caterpillar.

`Well, perhaps your feelings may be different,' said Alice; `all I know is, it would feel very queer to me.'

`You!' said the Caterpillar contemptuously. `Who are you?'

Which brought them back again to the beginning of the conversation. Alice felt a little irritated at the Caterpillar's making such very short remarks, and she drew herself up and said, very gravely, `I think, you ought to tell me who you are, first.'

`Why?' said the Caterpillar.

Here was another puzzling question; and as Alice could not think of any good reason, and as the Caterpillar seemed to be in a very unpleasant state of mind, she turned away.

`Come back!' the Caterpillar called after her. `I've something important to say!'

This sounded promising, certainly: Alice turned and came back again..."

........Alice in Wonderland

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Once upon a time in the 1970s I was made the In-Charge of II Year B Tech Lab at KGP. At that time all B Tech students had two years of Phy Lab and there used to be the impression that "Phy Lab is Peace!"

They were comparing it with the Electrical Technology Lab where the norm was that the Teacher, whoever it was, would first fling the Lab Khata of the student out of the second floor window and threaten that the student would soon follow suit.

And the Chemistry Lab was smelly.


On the other hand, the Second Year Phy Lab then was the most well-organized, courtesy our Colonel (subject of tomorrows blog).

The students were allowed to take their Lab Khatas home and work on them till the next class; and you don't have to be Feluda to guess what happens during that week...all the Hall Libraries had Lab Khatas donated by seniors:



 



 http://caughtinamist.blogspot.in/2009/03/aami-aar-feluda-feluda-i.html



There were well-written cookbooks of a decade vintage that had a set of typical viva-questions appended to each. Most of the 'teachers' were Research Scholars and they were happy with the 'set' questions whose answers could perhaps be found in the Research Scholar's BC Roy Hall Library ;-)


Since the lab was running smoothly, I didn't feel like tinkering with the system all at once. But something had to be done to dispel the notion of absolute Peace and replace it with occasional War. So, I decided to begin with skipping the 'set' viva questions and ask mine own.


I distinctly recall one tall, fair, and bespectacled student of II Year ME who had this habit of starting his answers with "Sir, Regaaading..." while he was thinking up. His name was Sumit Bose.


The first day he came to me for Lab Viva it went somewhat like this:


"What did you measure?"


"Sir, regaaading...refractive index of water using Newton's rings"


"How?"


"Sir, regaaading...the rings contract"


"Why?"


"Sir, regaaading...water has a refractive index..."


"Why?"


"Sir,...regaaading...speed of light is less in water"

"Why?"

"Sir...regaaading...light bends towards the normal"

"Why?"

"Sir, could you please take my Viva next week?"

"Sure...if it makes any difference..."

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His next experiment...

"What experiment?"

"Sir....regaaading...Post Office Box"

"Why?"

"Sir, regaaading...it was used in British Post Offices to measure the resistance of telephone cables"

"How?"

"Sir, regaaading... it uses the principle of Wheatstone's Bridge"

"Why?"

"Sir...regaaading...this bridge is very sensitive"


"Why?"


"Sir, regaaading...next week, sir?"


"Fine"


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A fortnight later my friend Vinod visited my room and said, laughing aloud:


"GP! I overheard one fair bespectacled lad on his pushbike talking about you in the most abusive terms"


"How?"


"He was saying to his friend: 'There is this new Research Scholar to whom I was allotted for my viva...I don't know...they call him GP or something...he is the greatest b*****d I have ever seen'..."


I laughed and said: "No more silly talk of Peace in the Phy Lab...Good!"


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