Sunday, December 15, 2013

To Gift or not to Gift - 1

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 ...Speaking of puppies, as I was a while back, I feel that I should warn inexperienced dog-owners who have discovered to their surprise and dismay a dozen puppies in a hall closet or under the floors of the barn, not to give them away. Sell them or keep them, but don't give them away. Sixty percent of persons who are given a dog for nothing bring him back sooner or later and plump him into the reluctant and unprepared lap of his former owner. The people say that they are going to Florida and can't take the dog, or that he doesn't want to go; or they point out he eats first editions or lace curtains or spinets, or he doesn't see eye to eye with them in the matter of housebreaking, or that he makes disparaging remarks under his breath about their friends. Anyway, they bring him back and you are stuck with him---and maybe six others. But if you charge ten or even five dollars for pups the new owners don't dare return them. They are afraid to ask for their money back because they believe you might think they are hard up and need the five or ten dollars. Furthermore, when a mischievous puppy is returned to its former owner it invariably behaves beautifully, and the person who brought it back is likely to be regarded as an imbecile or a dog hater or both...."


...James Thurber


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I got happily married, at last, in May 1979 and both my wife and I were very glad when the BCR Hopsital at IIT KGP declared that my medico wife tested Gravindex positive, in May 1980.

We were also a little worried. My wife was already 30 by then and BCR Hospital at IIT KGP was then not quite equipped to deliver babies safely. 

So both of us were overjoyed when my wife's parents, living a thousand miles away at Jalgaon, offered that they would get the delivery done at their place. There was a rider though. They asked me to reach their daughter at Jalgaon for her delivery. I was a little taken aback since I expected that they would come to KGP and carry their fond carrying daughter to their place. But my wife explained that her father was not altogether a spendthrift. 

I said ok.

I escorted my wife to Jalgaon in her ninth month and discovered that her parents had booked a slot for her at the Leela Bai Nursing Home where the gynecologist was an aging male doctor who declined to charge any money on the treatment of a fellow-medico...Hippocratic Oath. 

I was a little worried till I met the gentleman on the sixth day after he safely delivered our bonny baby per Caesarian Section. He proved to be a charming gent. My Father-in-Law was with me when I went to thank him heartily for his expertise and care and the neat environs of his nursing home. 

And I felt that, as a husband, it was my duty to offer him his fees instead of mere sweet words. The doctor was very happy with my offer and said that he wouldn't charge anything from a fellow-doctor, but if I was keen on it, I could donate any amount I liked to his Leela Bai Trust (Leela Bai was his late mom). And that I would get a pucca receipt on the basis of which I could claim rebate from my Income Tax.

That made me happy because my infant son turned out to be very fair and cute (unlike me as my wife's parents were rumored to have propagated). And I was in a thankful mood.

So without consulting my father-in-law, I took out my wallet and donated on the spot Rs 600, a whopping amount then for the services rendered. And took the receipt in my name, obviously.

The doctor was happy but my father-in-law wasn't. He felt hurt and insulted...he thought we could go scot-free with a 'thank-you-namaste'.

And an hour after we reached home, during which there were hush-hush arguments between my in-laws (male and female), my father-in-law visited me with Rs 600 in crisp hundred rupee notes and pushed them into my hands with a wry face.

You thought I would refuse the offer.

You read me wrong.

I pocketed it, and bought a sari for my wife, a Johnson & Johnson's Baby kit and a DCM infant-blanket for my son, all with my father-in-law's hard-earned money...perhaps he expected that I would gift him a gold ring and a pearl necklace to his wife...so sorry ;)



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