Thursday, September 4, 2014

Books in Brooks - Repeat Telecast

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Fractional distillation, a topic I learned while teaching Chemistry to my son in his Class Xsort of fascinated me...by the by, I was somewhat of a success as a Chemistry tutor...he went on to do his M Sc in Industrial Chemistry at IIT KGP.

What was fascinating was not so much the crude oil itself, but the separation and labeling of its various distillates. And I guess, as similes go, this gradation of components is there all over...say the gradation of geniuses...it is my contention that the word 'genius'  doesn't tolerate any adjective...like  the word, 'unique'. People talk of a 'true' genius as if the world is full of fake claimants. Our English poetry teacher in College used to go into raptures whenever he talked of Goldsmith calling him a versatile genius...he never applied this term to Shakespeare alright. Genius seems to come, for some people, in the grades light, medium and strong like Coffee in South Indian hotels.

I am talking about people's relation with books (other than the inescapable ones of their professions) and their gradation.

First come the Bitumen-grade. These are the avowed book-haters. Listen to our Autocrat:



"How sweetly and honestly one said to me the other day, 'I hate books!' A gentleman,---singularly free from affectations,---not learned, of course, but of perfect breeding, which is often so much better than learning,---by no means dull, in the sense of knowledge and society, but certainly not clever either in arts and sciences,---his company is pleasing to all who know him.....In fact, I think there are a great many gentlemen that really 'hate books,' but never had the wit to find it out, or the manliness to own it."

This evening there was a middle-aged visitor to our home and it just happened I had to engage him. And I was in no mood for small talk. So, I said I write booklets with their title having my granddaughter Ishani. This made him curious and he asked me to show him one. One was right there below the telephone and I gave it to him. He flipped through it for fifteen seconds and remarked: "I never read books." And then said, "Could you please lend me this booklet? I shall read it and return it to you" I told him that there are four others which make a set and I will gift him one set by and by. He was pleased. And of course I am not going to gift him any set till he comes and asks for it again, which I am sure he won't. Nothing wrong in it.

And he is a high-up Manager in a reputed Pharma Chain, posted in Hyderabad. 

I got printed a 100 copies of my first booklet, Limericks & Light Verses, and mailed them to all my uncles and cousins, about 30. I got acknowledgment from 5 and appreciation from 2. But there are others (friends of my cousins)  who now ask me for a copy which they browsed somewhere.

There was a curious reaction to the one I gifted to our retired Chief Engineer living in our previous apartment block. He said he tried to read it but after the first few attempts he gave up because the language I used is very different from the English he was taught in School....that said it all...he never read anything beyond his school level except Civil Engg books...no harm and, as our Autocrat said, he had the courage to admit it frankly.

But that was not all...he said:


"I have a friend who retired along with me and always boasts of his prowess in English. When he visits me next, I will challenge him to tell me the meaning of your verse (he didn't use the strange word 'limerick') that occurs in the beginning":

Older folks ought not ogle
Lest their eyes goggle and boggle;
But old and young
Queen and King
All of us ought to Google!


I asked him why he chose this as his 'test-paper'. And he said that he was sure his friend, like himself, has never heard of all those ogles, goggles, boggles, and Googles. He didn't find any of them in his English-Telugu pocket dictionary.

And a couple of years passed. An old man living in our Apartment Complex died. And there was a congregation blocking the main gate. And I had to go to fetch my 2-liter bottle of Sprite. And as I was sneaking through the interstitial spaces, I was called out by our CE and he introduced me to an old man there:

"Sastry Garu! Meet my friend of whom I talked about as an expert in English."

And as I was trying to extend my hand and thinking about some inanity to utter, the gentleman in question turned his face, pretending to meet some other VIP guest...and ran away as if I was going to take his viva on that ogle thing.

The CE was amused beyond himself.

But there is nothing wrong in admitting his ignorance of ogling although I am sure he does it all the time like any other retiree.

After all, my knowledge of beams, trusses, roads and buildings and helipads is NIL and I am not ashamed to admit it...but English is different...they ruled us for two centuries mercilessly...



...Posted by Ishani

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