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People collect coins, stamps, books and antiques; also spectacles, watches, pens and samples of body fluids of Gandhijee, for outright sale or auction.
They all leave their beloved collections behind to their progeny when they depart from here.
I however am a Smile Collector.
I take my collection with me wherever I go, here or hereafter. Collecting smiles is a passion with me and I have been doing this from childhood. These are free and nobody else wants them...strictly private property.
As with coins and stamps and kama sutras, the thing is to first classify smiles and label them in identifiable groups such as:
1. Beatific Smiles:
These are the best and truly divine, the sole preserve of babies and saints. Unfortunately I met no saint but I have watched four of my younger sisters, son, and Ishani closely when they were just three months old....the tender age at which they flash their first smile of love at their moms.
2. Ingratiating Smiles:
These are the worst kind and are flashed when people have an ax to grind. None of my students did this...they were too dignified. But Gouri Babu of the Accounts Section of IIT KGP must have seen these on my face the couple of dozen times I had to approach him for dire PF Loans.
3. Understanding Smiles:
I have seen hundreds of these when suddenly one or the other of my students thought that they have absorbed a tough concept that was beyond me.
4. Un-understanding Smiles:
Also called grin...a charming sight in Grand Viva when the victim has absolutely no clue.
5. Recognition Smiles:
These are the broadest and most spontaneous and pleasing. Tikka at Harry's, Mohinder at Thacker's, Balai Babu and his youngest brother Nitai, Bhanja Tailors; and the twins Lav & Kush, the tea dispensers at the Tech Market, flashed these at me when I resurfaced at KGP 5 years after my retirement. Just lovely.
6. Mona Lisa Smiles:
These enigmatic smiles are well known to be due to a congenital deformity in the facial muscles. I better leave it at that.
7. Victorious Smiles:
My Guru SDM flashed these whenever the referee of Annals of Physics had to admit that he could in no way follow how Eq 16 comes from Eq 15...SDM gobbled up at least ten intermediate equations...these are largely self-defeating because all such victories are at best Pyrrhic.
8. Sardonic Smiles:
One never knows whether the smiler is smiling at you or your joke. My grannie was famous for these.
9. Toothy Smiles:
The fortunate few who have a wonderful set of teeth like my Father and Madhuri Dixit could afford these.
10. Toothless Smiles:
The smiles of Gandhijee are samples of these wonders.
11. Ocular Smiles:
Those who have dirty teeth like me have to resort to these.
12. Disarming Smiles:
Grand Viva again, but the hapless victim has to be beautiful and vivacious.
13. Silent Smiles:
These are called chuckles. Aniket is expert at these, even on phone...
14. Superior Smiles:
Prof P regrets that his friends and relatives wrongly accuse him of these. But at me he has always flashed his most charming smile...the genuine thing.
15. Horsey Smiles:
Next in beauty only to Donkey Smiles.
People collect coins, stamps, books and antiques; also spectacles, watches, pens and samples of body fluids of Gandhijee, for outright sale or auction.
They all leave their beloved collections behind to their progeny when they depart from here.
I however am a Smile Collector.
I take my collection with me wherever I go, here or hereafter. Collecting smiles is a passion with me and I have been doing this from childhood. These are free and nobody else wants them...strictly private property.
As with coins and stamps and kama sutras, the thing is to first classify smiles and label them in identifiable groups such as:
1. Beatific Smiles:
These are the best and truly divine, the sole preserve of babies and saints. Unfortunately I met no saint but I have watched four of my younger sisters, son, and Ishani closely when they were just three months old....the tender age at which they flash their first smile of love at their moms.
2. Ingratiating Smiles:
These are the worst kind and are flashed when people have an ax to grind. None of my students did this...they were too dignified. But Gouri Babu of the Accounts Section of IIT KGP must have seen these on my face the couple of dozen times I had to approach him for dire PF Loans.
3. Understanding Smiles:
I have seen hundreds of these when suddenly one or the other of my students thought that they have absorbed a tough concept that was beyond me.
4. Un-understanding Smiles:
Also called grin...a charming sight in Grand Viva when the victim has absolutely no clue.
5. Recognition Smiles:
These are the broadest and most spontaneous and pleasing. Tikka at Harry's, Mohinder at Thacker's, Balai Babu and his youngest brother Nitai, Bhanja Tailors; and the twins Lav & Kush, the tea dispensers at the Tech Market, flashed these at me when I resurfaced at KGP 5 years after my retirement. Just lovely.
6. Mona Lisa Smiles:
These enigmatic smiles are well known to be due to a congenital deformity in the facial muscles. I better leave it at that.
7. Victorious Smiles:
My Guru SDM flashed these whenever the referee of Annals of Physics had to admit that he could in no way follow how Eq 16 comes from Eq 15...SDM gobbled up at least ten intermediate equations...these are largely self-defeating because all such victories are at best Pyrrhic.
8. Sardonic Smiles:
One never knows whether the smiler is smiling at you or your joke. My grannie was famous for these.
9. Toothy Smiles:
The fortunate few who have a wonderful set of teeth like my Father and Madhuri Dixit could afford these.
10. Toothless Smiles:
The smiles of Gandhijee are samples of these wonders.
11. Ocular Smiles:
Those who have dirty teeth like me have to resort to these.
12. Disarming Smiles:
Grand Viva again, but the hapless victim has to be beautiful and vivacious.
13. Silent Smiles:
These are called chuckles. Aniket is expert at these, even on phone...
14. Superior Smiles:
Prof P regrets that his friends and relatives wrongly accuse him of these. But at me he has always flashed his most charming smile...the genuine thing.
15. Horsey Smiles:
Next in beauty only to Donkey Smiles.
You can take it up from here...if you too are a Smile Collector...
...Posted by Ishani
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1 comment:
Prof Manasi Sinha writes:
You may add one more type of smile in your collection of smiles. Invisible or Imaginable Smile that invariably appears in the countenance of your readers like me after reading each of your postings. Only your talent can describe what kind of smile that can be!
Thanks for your Breakfast item that kept me smiling for a considerable time.
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