Wednesday, March 23, 2016

Kiss of Death


From times immemorial I have been suffering from a strange disease which I had called Bloomerism earlier:

It is somewhat akin to malapropism but not quite the same thing. A malapropism is a speech confusion like saying:

"I joined Alcoholics Unanimous"

Mine is more like tweakapropism. 

I see something in print and, while trying to read it, what registers in my mind is quite another thing than what is printed. Something similar but bewitching. Often atrocious. But I get carried away into a reverie that lasts quite a few bewildering minutes till I re-read the thing when everything becomes meaningful but prosaic. Thurber would have loved me.

For instance, in the post I referred to above, I read that our builder failed to redeem his promise to install 32 girls at the sixteen landings in our apartment complex. Quite a beguiling promise till the 32 girls turned out to be 32 grills after all.

This morning I was scanning the headlines on Page 5 of our DC and read the item as:

Man gets lifer for kissing sis-in-law

I felt sorry for the chap and was wondering how tough our law has become under the new regime which is somewhat puritanical.

It is the two 's's in sis that misled me by their proximity.

Turned out that the chap really 'killed' his sis-in-law. He hit the dame with his auto and tried to make it seem a hit-and-run affair...not a kiss-and-run affair.

Serves him right...but what about ME!!!

It was so much wasted sympathy...not empathy...I have no sis-in-law, for kissing or killing or kicking...

Yet another headline on Page 4 today that I read as:

Hell-tourism project faces rough weather


...Posted by Ishani


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