Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Morpheus Mellitus - 4

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 "...By this time I must have turned green, because Wigner said: 'No, no! Don't worry! I'll just warn you though: If Professor Russell falls asleep----and he will undoubtedly fall asleep----it doesn't mean that your seminar is bad; he falls asleep in all the seminars'...."

........Feynman "Joking"  

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I don't think I fell asleep in any class that I attended. In our school when the teacher tended to be a bore, we used to play 'dot' games with our neighbors. In the University, we retreated to the back bench and ogled. There was no attendance rule in our enlightened University. And there were no Teachers' Assessment Marks.

Sourya Ray wrote:


"...I think your class used to be the only one where I have never seen anybody dozing off. Everybody used to be fully engaged and stay alert. Others used to be completely captivated..."

I guess Sourya was so completely captivated by the blackboard he didn't have time to watch others. Sure there were students who dozed. But I was happy about it...let sleeping students lie...no point making a fuss about it...unless they snore and disturb other students' sleep.

But what about Teachers who sleep?

The canonical example, as I mentioned earlier, was Prof AVKR (sadly no more) who was as much a fixture in the Third Year Lab as I was in the Fourth Year. Once AK (sadly no more) asked me to come and watch AVKR doze with his head completely laid low like a ripe coconut dangling from its branch. I went one afternoon and found what AK (who was his Lab Co-Teacher) said was absolutely true.

After a few minutes, a couple of students came to the Teachers' Table and stood beside AVKR's chair and started saying softly: "Sir, sir" and then in increasing db: "Saar, Saaaar!" And then AVKR woke up and smiled at us and asked the students what the matter was. They said they had been trying Kelvin's Double Bridge for the past two classes but were getting nowhere near a balance point of any sharpness. AVKR gave them a hint: "Try 100 ohms, 100 oms and 250 ohms..." (or something like that). The students went away never to return...KGPhians know how to get the other dozen balance points if they get one ;-)

AVKR smiled at us and went back to his coconut stupor till another couple of students came and woke him up and told him that their B-H Curve was not coming....

AVKR had the reputation of never getting up from his Teachers' Table in his Lab Class...and AK was left practically alone in his chair undisturbed by students.

How does it matter if the Teacher is awake or asleep...as long he catches mice?

Lab Class sleeper cells are ok...but what about lecture teachers? My friend NP told me that Prof GLS of ME (no idea if he is here or elsewhere) used to doze and hide it by turning his back, facing the blackboard while drooling...the wet patch on the blackboard said it all...YAWN!!!

This should be called somnambulinstruction...

One night after a sumptuous dinner I was 'coaching' my son in Physics when he was in Class X of KV. He was reading his text aloud and I closed my eyes to listen with rapt attention. He apparently read aloud the question: "What causes tides in the oceans?" And I apparently replied: "Gole Bazaar". There were no witnesses and I have to take his word at its face value although he was an expert at reading his physics text while asleep...somnautolocution.

My medico sister and her class mate once had embarked on 'joint studies'. As you know, the volumes of anatomy, physiology, pharmacology, medicine and others  were each vying in their girth with Volume X of Encyclopedia Britannica. Apparently they postponed studying their horrendous Physiology book (Best & Taylor) to the night before their exam...they were so confident of their grip on the subject (the only one with some physics in it). 

And were feeling sleepy too early and so took one Ritalin tablet each which was supposed to keep them awake the whole night come what may. They did keep awake the whole night but felt completely disoriented in the Exam Hall...the Lab Marks rescued them...

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