Sunday, September 8, 2013

Mute Button

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...All during the long winter months I worked away at this job. I gave no thought, of course, to the family. But they did to me. Our house was heated by a furnace, which had big warm air-pipes; these ran up through the walls with wide outlets into each room, and sound travelled easily and ringingly through their roomy, tin passages. My violin could be heard in every part of the house. No one could settle down to anything while I was practising. If visitors came they soon left. Mother couldn't even sing to the baby. She would wait, watching the clock, until my long hour of scale-work was over, and then come downstairs and shriek at me that my time was up. She would find me sawing away with my forehead wet, and my hair wet and stringy, and even my clothes slowly getting damp from my exertions. She would feel my collar, which was done for, and say I must change it. "Oh, Mother! Please!"--for I was in a hurry now to run out and play. But she wasn't being fussy about my collar, I can see, looking back; she was using it merely as a barometer or gauge of my pores. She thought I had better dry myself before going out in the snow.

It was a hard winter for Mother. I believe she also had fears for the baby. She sometimes pleaded with Father; but no one could ever tell Father anything. He continued to stand like a rock against stopping my lessons...

...Clarence Day in 'The Noblest Instrument'

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When asked what he liked most on the Television, RKN is said to have replied:

"The mute button on the remote"

I completely agree with him. I almost don't know how to tell music from noise...after a few minutes of listening to the scores of even stalwarts like Zubin Mehta (much in the news in the non-musical valley of tears and teargases) I feel enough is enough. And the Lungi Dance that Ishani loves to distraction is a pain in the eardrums for me. It is a matter of constitution. Like a Professor at IIT KGP told me he never reads books or newspapers that are useless to him in his profession.

In Muthukur in the 1950s we had dozens of donkeys. RKN wrote a piece on Donkey and says that there is no difference between a donkey and an ass...when one tires of saying donkey one switches to ass.

We had lots of street dogs too. And once in a while they made such a ruckus in the night that one felt like having the mute button in his hands. And dogs made this infernal collective barks when they involved themselves in a bitter fight over precedence in the making of their progeny.

But the Muthukur donkeys never fought. At least no one saw them fight. RKN says that donkeys are next to saints in their behavior. They silently go about their tasks feeding on the grass on the kerb or chewing bits and pieces of used newspapers that merchants wrapped their rice and dal in. And stand still under a tree for hours merely flapping their ears to shoo the flies away. And when it is hot they take shelter standing under an awning. But if two of them happen to stand in the same shade, they wouldn't face each other...they stand side by side with the face of one beside the tail of the other...like the figure 69.

But once in a while at midnight they go into a sort of spiritual ecstasy and start braying in unison...no one knew why.

It was then again that we wished we had a mute button.

Talking of donkeys, here is an anecdote:

It is about the heated controversy over the well-known Sanskrit Shlok repeated at the beginning any auspicious Puja:

Shuklambaradharam vishnum sasi varnam chaturbhujam
Prasanna vadanam dhyayet sarva vighnopasantaye


There is a terrific fight still raging in the cyberspace about the god that is invoked in this mantra. 

The Vaishanvites insist that it is for their Lord Vishnu since Vishnu is mentioned in the first half of the shloka. And the Shaivites vehemently oppose it saying it is about Ganeshjee (tomorrow happens to be his Day) since there is this Vighnopasantaye in the second half. And everyone knows that Ganeshjee is also known as Vighneshwar and the invocation is to thwart any vighnas (jinxes) to the proposed Puja.

And there was one highly respected Vedam Venkataraya Sastry (1853-1929) who worked as a Sanskrit Pundit in the Madras Christian College (my Father's alma mater) for all of 25 years.

As you know, all Sastrys are a bit screwy. 

So VVS decided to resolve the dispute saying that the shlok under question is neither for Lord Vishnu nor Ganeshjee but for a Donkey.

Here is his interpretation:

1. Shuklambaradharam  

Means one who wears or carries on him pure white clothes. Which the donkey does everyday on his back from the Dhobi Ghat after they are washed.

2. Vishnum

Means omnipresent or seen everywhere. Donkeys were indeed seen everywhere before the advent of mopeds.


3. Sasi Varnam

Means white and bright as the full moon. No one has ever seen a thoroughbred donkey that was any color other than white and bright. At least I didn't...in Muthukur.

4. Chaturbhujam

Means having four shoulders. All donkeys I saw were quadrupeds. And each ped was as stout as the shoulder of Rustum. 

5. Prasanna vadanam

Means having a pleasing face. Try mounting a donkey from behind...you get a fatal kick...so by contrast, its face is pleasing for sure. 


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This is how our Sastrys of yore expended their wits and energies instead of going to IIT KGP to teach Physics...of sorts. 


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