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On retiring and settling down in Hyderabad, I was looking for my first hair-cut.
I had always resisted hair-cuts. And used to postpone them till strands of hair fell on my eyes and made me blind...especially since cataracts destroyed my vision mostly.
There are traits peculiar to humans...my son would visit his hi-tech saloon every fortnight if he could (more for the massages he is fond of...like my father was).
But my son resists taking baths like any healthy child...Ishani has her daily fights with her mom about it during these days of lockdown when her school has gone online.
On the other hand, I love to take half a dozen baths every day....it is an obsession with me (OCD...Obsessive Compulsive Disorder).
And before each bath I discard my used banian.
Since I prefer to use the family-washing-machine only once a week, I keep a stock of 40 banians...no joke that!
A few years ago, my ophthalmologist-nephew threatened me that my cataracts would burst and make me totally blind (with pain on the side). And then I decided to get them removed by a surgical procedure that I feared.
One of those days the dad of one of my ex-students was visiting me. He had his cataracts removed recently then; and was encouraging me to go ahead.
But I protested:
"Apparently I am not allowed to take any bath for a whole month after surgery"
"What else could be a better blessing?"
There was this story of my childhood:
Men (and women) wanted to know from Lord Brahma about their righteous conduct. And sent a buffalo as a messenger to Him. And he said:
"Let them take three baths daily and eat once a week"
And the buffalo-messenger got it all mixed up and conveyed the orders of Brahma thus:
"Let men and women eat thrice daily and take bath once a week"
That was how our 'breakfast-lunch-dinner' routine started (leaving snacking in between aside).
And Brahma got wild with the errant buffalo and cursed him thus:
"Go and till the lands of humans so they can eat all those sumptuous meals"
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Returning to my first hair-cut in Hyderabad:
We were then renting in a flat in SR Nagar.
And I walked to the nearest barber shop and found it closed shut. And then I walked further and further all over Amirpet and found every barber shop closed shut.
I returned home and rang up my Hyderabadi B-i-L. And he said:
"All barber shops in Hyderabad are closed on Tuesdays"
"Why Tuesdays?"
"No Hyderabadi would have his hair cut on Tuesdays. Tuesday is inauspicious for hair cuts"
I then remembered my sad plight in Gudur in the summer of 2003 while I was vacationing there with my mother and working sister.
On a Friday night I developed an acute attack of a stomach infection. And next morning my sister got me admitted to the local nursing home. The doctor was kind and tried his best to cure me.
Message reached my Nellore sister and B-i-L, and both of them arrived at Gudur to look after me in shifts of day and night (My wife was then with her mom in Vijayawada).
By Monday morning I was only half-cured...the doctor being a pediatrician.
My Nellore sister and B-i-L were a working couple and were eager to get back to Nellore.
And they asked the doctor to discharge me that Monday evening itself.
I protested that I was still ill. But they said:
"Tomorrow is Tuesday. Tuesdays and Saturdays are inauspicious for discharges"
So I was brought home that Monday evening and the Nellore couple ran back to their Nellore.
That night I couldn't stand it anymore. And the next morning my resident sister got me re-admitted (Tuesdays and Saturdays being ok for admission but).
That evening my medico-wife arrived at Gudur.
She consulted my renowned Doctor-B-i-L at Madurai who said:
"Ask the pediatrician to mix three bottles of Metrogyl and three bottles of Ciprofloxacin in the saline"
And one bottle of each cured me (well before Saturday :)
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This reminds me of our rocket-scientist Abdul Kalam in 2002.
The BJP-led Government (for reasons political) selected him as our next President. And he agreed, I don't know why.
An Ambassador was sent to Kalam to civilize him for his forthcoming august job.
The first thing the Ambassador wanted was to have Kalam's famous locks clipped to his ears.
And Kalam declined politely...he being a bachelor, he had no wife, and his hanging locks were all that he loved.
The Ambassador then asked Kalam to discard his bush shirts and loose pants and get himself measured for the Bandh-Gala which was de rigueur for the President of India.
Kalm agreed reluctantly.
Then the Ambassador said:
"Thursday is auspicious for the inauguration. Would it suit you?"
"All days are alike. Earth revolves around itself smoothly every 24 hours. There is no break at midnight. Nor at midday. Nor on Tuesday nor on Saturday"
The Ambassador laughed at the foolishness of Kalam (he was a firm believer in astrology, numerology, vaastu, planets, rings, amulets, mantras and tantras).
It is a different matter that he was shot dead by his own brother four little years later at the tender age of 56...Kalam lived till 83.
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To be continued
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