Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Condescension

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Condescension
is worse than Donation.

It is not material but ethereal and is an Attitude Thing.

Like the Bud asking the Bee to come tomorrow; the Fruit however knows that the Flower has been at the Receiving End.

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All girls in their teens look beautiful and they are acutely aware of it.

This teenage classmate of mine, Ms K, was no exception.

In our 3rd Year B Sc (Hons) her devout mom felt that her genius-daughter needs some 'guidance' in Complex Variables. So, she approached the talented Math Prof Dr J to coach her daughter (for free) every evening at 9 PM since they were living in the same Housing Complex. Dr J was a bachelor in his mid-30s and they all feel awkward with girls (ask me!). He was my friend's elder brother and so sent for me if I was interested to join their Tutorial Class. Since I am weak in math I gladly agreed.

Dr J was unfortunately albinic and had to wear dark glasses day and night.

The third evening Dr J and me waited from 9 to 10 for the arrival of Ms K, but to no avail. Since Dr J didn't want to repeat his lesson, we gossiped and parted.

Next evening Ms K arrived a few minutes late, and Dr J genially asked her why she was absent yesterday.

And got her charming reply: "OK, I shall be regular hereafter".

Dr J blushed so pink that for a moment his face ceased to look albinic.

It is the "OK" that did it...Condescension at its worst!

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In 1980 I was traveling with my pregnant wife on the Howrah-Bombay Mail.

At Rajnandgaon she suddenly felt this desperate urge to eat Dal Vadas. It is a superstition with us that if the whimsical urges of pregnant ladies are not met forthwith, the kid will be born grumpy and discontented.

So, I bought half a dozen Vadas and got them packed in twos. She could eat just one and I the other. Since I am paranoid about wasting food I was looking to give away those untouched 4 Vadas to someone in need.

Then I saw this unfortunate soul on the Platform with both legs amputated pushing his 4-wheeler board, with a tin of coins attached to it. I debated for a while and decided to quietly leave the packet in his hands.

He gave me a dirty look and tossed the packets on the railway track.

I felt bad and resolved that I would never give anybody anything unless explicitly asked...a Golden Rule that avoided a repetition of that unfortunate aspersion of Condescension.

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This Grade-3 Cricketer was walking along the Vizagh Beach and was mobbed by a crowd of teenagers who asked him for his autograph. He felt he has reached Heaven and instantly pleased every one of them.

As he was walking along quite pleased with himself, he saw this other fabulous teenage girl coming along and asked her charmingly: "Autograph?"

At once she pulled her pen out of her croc-skin handbag and asked him for his autograph book.

Turned out she was a Grade-4 Vernacular Film Actress.

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Ishani is just one-year old.

As all healthy kids of her age, she is as pretty as a picture of that Nursery Rhyme: Chubby Cheeks, Dimple Chin, Glowing Skin, Rosy Lips...

Every morning @ 9 I carry her around for a bit of sunbathing and we park ourselves on the granite bench outside our Apartment Complex to watch the birds and winter flowers and the Commuter Rush.

Those who happen to peek at her in their hurried walk stop in their tracks to blow her a kiss or squeeze her cheeks, or pet and cuddle her.

Since I am a famous mind-reader, I know what Ishani feels.....

....Very Very Condescending....


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