Nails & Screws

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1980 IIT KGP:

Nails & Screws

Professor SK Dutta-Roy was two decades older to me. He was a Senior Professor when I was a Junior Lecturer.

Yet, he was very friendly and jovial with me.

He was made Professor-in-Charge of the upcoming Cryogenics Center. And within two years he installed a liquid nitrogen plant that could deliver liquid nitrogen for whoever wanted it, research labs or fisheries.

He was an experimental researcher while I dabbled in theory. 

One night when I was walking to the Tech Market, I found him on the road in a serious discussion with a couple of his research scholars. 

He stopped me and said:

"Hey! Shastri! Our liquid nitrogen plant is ready and we can deliver it to all research labs."

"Oh! How wonderful! Everyone who did their experiments at room temperature can now repeat them at low temperatures"

"Yes! Yes! Very true!"

And then he saw the twinkle in my eyes, and chased me down the road :)

Two decades later he was the Physics JEE-in-Charge at KGP. After participating in the paper-setting ritual, he suffered a massive heart attack. And was recovering from it when time came for the local spot valuation. 

He then asked me:

"Hey! Shastri! Be the Chief Examiner in my place for this onerous job and help me please! Won't you?"

"Why me when there are so many senior professors eager to do this job?"

"Because you are my friend!"

"I shall do it if you sit down quietly on that faraway chair and don't involve yourself in my quarrels with the examiners"

"OK"

But I had no administrative skills and I acquired the jibe of a 'Head Master' which was fine with me being the son of a headmaster.

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Prof Dutta-Roy once told me that all Sanyals (like our Director GS Sanyal) belonged to the sub-caste of Barik Brahmins. 

And they are reputed to be crooked...so crooked that if you drive nails into their skulls and pull them out, they will emerge as screws :)

I loved the joke and once narrated it to Prof Bhattacharya, my neighbor across the fence.

He smiled.

And later Prof Dutta-Roy told me that some Bhattacharyas like my neighbor were also Barik Brahmins!

Phew!!!

Prof Dutta-Roy let it out once that all Bengalis with double surnames (hyphenated or conjoined, like his own) belonged to the Boddi (Vaidya) sub-caste and they were all very clannish. So clannish that a Boddi would only select another Boddi (if available) for a cushy job in an interview.

I was very friendly with many Boddis like Senguptas, Dasguptas, Dattaguptas, Dasvaidyas etc...

They were all very sportive about their surnames.

Once I was sitting under the canteen mango tree when Prof Saradindu Sengupta joined me. And I told him what Dutta-Roy told me about the clannishness of all Boddis like him.

He smiled and narrated this joke:

Once in an interview a Boddi selected a Dr Vaidyanathan out of a dozen candidates. 

And he was asked why he selected a Tamilian Brahmin leaving so many Bengali candidates.

"What to do? There was no Boddi among the applicants. This Tamilian at least had a Boddi (Vaidya) in his surname"

:)

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